Findom is short for financial domination. A submissive pays money or gifts to a dominant for the thrill of giving up control, usually online and without meeting. It is lawful between adults, and it is also a place where scams and blackmail are common.
How it works
The dominant, often called a findomme, sets the terms. The payer, sometimes called a paypig or a money slave, sends money, buys gifts or pays for messages. There is usually no physical contact. The appeal is the power exchange itself, which is why what submissive means and dom, domme, sub and switch are the right background.
The risks
- Fake dominants. Profiles that take payment and vanish, or that ask for more after the first payment.
- Blackmail. Someone who gets your name, photographs or messages and threatens to share them unless you pay. This is a crime, and paying rarely ends it.
- Spending that gets out of control. Because the payment is the point, there is no natural limit.
Staying safe
- Set a budget in advance and keep to it. Never use credit or money you cannot afford to lose.
- Use a payment method that can be traced, never gift cards, and never send identification.
- Keep your real name, workplace and photographs out of it.
- If you are being blackmailed, stop contact, do not pay, keep the messages and report it to the police and to Report Fraud at reportfraud.police.uk.
- If the spending is a problem, MoneyHelper and your GP can help without judgement.
The law treats findom like other consensual adult activity, but fraud and blackmail are offences. Safety and help has the contacts.