Kink means any sexual interest or practice outside what is thought of as conventional. Kinky is the adjective. The words are broad on purpose, and they sit above more specific ones such as fetish and BDSM.
Kink, fetish and BDSM
- Kink. The widest term. Role play, bondage, spanking, costume and power games can all be called kinky.
- Fetish. A strong sexual interest in a particular object, material, body part or situation, such as latex, feet or uniforms.
- BDSM. A set of practices built on bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism and masochism, with agreed roles. What is BDSM? explains each part.
- Vanilla. The word kinky people use for conventional sex. It is not an insult.
How consent works
Kink depends on talking first. People agree what is on offer and what is not, keep a safe word that stops everything at once, and take time afterwards to check in, often called aftercare. A limit is never negotiated in the moment. What submissive means and dom, domme, sub and switch cover the roles.
Kink and escorts
Many adverts list kink related services, from role play to domination. They are offers, not promises, and each is agreed beforehand. Fetish and domination escorts explains the labels, and the services index covers the rest.
The law
Between consenting adults, kink is lawful. The limit is harm. In 1993 the House of Lords held in R v Brown that consent is not a defence to actual bodily harm in sadomasochistic activity, and the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 says consent is not a defence to causing serious harm for sexual gratification. A responsible partner or escort stays well inside that line. See Is escorting legal in the UK? for the wider picture.